Can a married man take a second wife and point to King David for biblical support? The question matters to the man considering it, to the wife he has already made vows to, and to the church he may ask to bless the arrangement. Scripture gives us two responsibilities here. We are to honor God’s design for marriage and obey the civil laws where we live.
What did God tell David?
In 2 Samuel 12:8, God said to David through Nathan, “And I gave thee thy master’s house, and thy master’s wives into thy bosom.” David’s former master was Saul. Nathan was recounting what God had already given David. When he spoke of what more God could have given, he used the words “such and such things.”
The next verse tells us why Nathan brought up those blessings. David had taken Uriah’s wife and arranged for Uriah to be killed. God asked David, “Wherefore hast thou despised the commandment of the LORD, to do evil in his sight?” (2 Samuel 12:9). Nathan was rebuking David for taking another man’s wife. To turn that rebuke into permission to take a second wife is to miss the point of the passage. God had already warned Israel’s kings, “Neither shall he multiply wives to himself, that his heart turn not away” (Deuteronomy 17:17).
What did Jesus teach about marriage?
When the Pharisees asked Jesus about divorce, He took them back to creation. Genesis 2:24 says, “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.” Jesus repeated that teaching and made the number plain. “They twain shall be one flesh” (Matthew 19:5). He then said, “What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder” (Matthew 19:6).
Paul gave the congregation the same pattern. “Let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband” (1 Corinthians 7:2). He also required a bishop to be “the husband of one wife” (1 Timothy 3:2). Church leaders should model the faithfulness they teach. The pattern given to the church is one man and one woman joined in marriage.
What about the law where we live?
Romans 13:1 says, “Let every soul be subject unto the higher powers.” Peter gives the reason for that obedience when he writes, “Submit yourselves to every ordinance of man for the Lord’s sake” (1 Peter 2:13). Acts 5:29 gives the rule when civil authorities require disobedience to God. “We ought to obey God rather than men.” A man who wants to take a second wife cannot appeal to that exception, because God has given him no command to do so.
Here in Texas, Family Code § 6.202 provides that a second marriage entered into while either party is still married to someone else is void. Texas Penal Code § 25.01 also makes bigamy a criminal offense. The law can reach an attempt to marry under circumstances that would otherwise constitute a marriage. It can also apply when a married person lives with someone else in Texas, they represent themselves as married, and either intends to be married. Calling it a private religious ceremony or leaving out the marriage license gives no automatic exemption. Churches outside Texas should consult the law that applies where they serve.
How should a church respond?
A pastor should decline to perform or bless a second marriage while the first marriage remains in force. He should also make time to hear the wife’s concerns and offer her pastoral care. To the husband, the counsel should be plain. Set aside the plan to take a second wife and keep the vows you made to the wife you already have.
Scripture tells him what keeping those vows looks like. “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it” (Ephesians 5:25). A husband can begin by listening to his wife, asking forgiveness where he has wronged her, and showing through his choices that he takes his promises to her seriously.
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